I Don't Know How To Be This Person


02 Jan
02Jan

"The Complete Guide to Breast Cancer: How to Feel Empowered and Take Control" is written by two female physicians who each battled cancer.  The information is factual, supportive, and personal.  And, it scared me!  

I now know that I am definitely a member of Club Pink.  What I have is NOT simply an acute medical condition that would eventually get addressed and I would get on with my life.  NO!  My body has signaled that it is prone to creating cancerous cells and that will require lifelong vigilance and lifestyle modification.  Wow, how did my body break this way?  It's been so healthy, so strong, so resilient.  It's never stopped me from doing what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it.  But now, it's demanding attention, priority. 

I don't really know how to be this person who lovingly cares for her body and maintains a state of vigilance for recurring cancers.  I've never lived in fear of what my body would do, could do.  Assimilating this new state will take some figuring out.  I don't want it to be the focus of my life but rather an integrated, new way of being who I already am. 


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